Happy 2nd birthday Lucy!

We took down all Christmas decorations today, are mostly packed, Troy is double checking my checklists, and we really should go to bed now.....

Tonight we went to my cousins place for a New Years party for a few hours so we could see the family before taking off and so that we could have a good meal.   That is right I had no urge to prepare dinner tonight knowing I have cleared my fridge out of most things that won't last 3 weeks and I am just not in the mood. Thanks Jen and Clarence for a great night, it was exactly what we needed.  

As we celebrate Lucy's birthday today, we were so touched to see her name on a cake that was presented tonight at the party.  She shares the birthday month with about 5 other people in the combined families that attended.  How lovely to see her name belong to the rest of the family in these celebrations.  Kyla proudly took part in blowing out the candles as she told people that her sister was not there so she would do it for her.

For a few days now I have been feeling this incredible pain and sadness that is hard to explain.  Don't get me wrong, we are totally thrilled that in 5 sleeps we get to hold Lucy, we can't wait for that moment, we want it to happen now.  The feelings I am having is about what Lucy is going to go through in 5 days when she is thrust into our arms and she won't understand why she is being left with us.  A two year old understands who cares for them, who hugs them, feeds them and plays with them.  She has no idea that she only has a few days left in the place where things are familiar.  First off we will be speaking "alien" to her as she only speaks mandarin.  Then Kyla will be all in her face trying to play with her and give her instructions on what to do...(K has tendencies of leading the pack and being quite loud about her intentions).  We have no idea on what to expect in 5 days and the weeks to follow.  All I know is that there is one piece of advice that keeps me calm.  Adoption......all it takes is love and time.

Good night Lucy, we love you so much.  Happy Birthday!